TYPES OF VERBAL BULLYING

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When someone is being verbally abused, the person attacking them may use overt forms of abuse like engaging in name-calling and making threats, but also more insidious methods like gaslighting or constantly correcting, interrupting, putting down, and demeaning them.

Even prolonged silent treatment is a form of verbal abuse. When this happens, the person is attempting to control and punish the victim by refusing to talk to them.

For some people, especially those who experience verbal abuse in the home or experienced it as a child, it can often be overlooked because verbal assaults feel like a normal way to communicate. But they are anything but normal and can have lasting consequences.

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Verbal abuse can take many different forms, including:

• Blaming: This type involves making the victim believe they are responsible for the abusive behavior or that they bring the verbal abuse upon themselves.

• Condescension: While often disguised as humor, sarcastic comments that are intended to belittle and demean the other person can be a form of verbal abuse.

• Criticism: This involves harsh and persistent remarks that are meant to make the person feel bad about themselves and are not constructive but deliberate and hurtful. Criticism can be painful in public or private, particularly if the person is simply being mean and has no intention of being constructive.

• Gaslighting: This is a type of insidious, and sometimes covert, emotional abuse were the abuser makes the target question their judgements and reality.

• Humiliation: When you are insulted in public by a peer, a friend, a family member, or a dating partner, this can be particularly painful.

• Judging: This type of verbal abuse involves looking down on the victim, not accepting them for who they are, or holding them to unrealistic expectations.

• Manipulation: Using words to manipulate and control the other person is also a type of verbal abuse. This can include making statements like, "If you really loved me, you wouldn't talk to other people about our relationship," or using guilt trips to get you to do certain things

• Name-calling: Abusive, derogatory language, or insults that chip away at the target’s self-esteem, sense of self-worth, and self-concept. Anytime someone engages in name-calling, it is a form of verbal abuse. Even if the names are said in a neutral voice, this is not an acceptable treatment of another person.

• Ridicule: Typically, verbally abusive people will make you the butt of their jokes. This can be done in private or in person. But if you don't find it funny, then it is not harmless fun. What's more, verbally abusive people usually select jokes that attack an area where you feel vulnerable or weak.

• Threats: This involves statements meant to frighten, control, and manipulate the victim into compliance. No threat should ever be taken lightly. When people make threats, they are trying to control and manipulate you. Remember, there is no better way to control someone than to make them fearful in some way.

• Withholding: This type of verbal abuse involves a refusal to give affection or attention, including talking to you, looking at you, or even being in the same room with you. Examples of withholding or ignoring include stonewalling or giving someone the silent treatment.

While not an exhaustive list, these are several examples of the common types of verbal abuse that can occur.